All addictions have one thing in common, whether it’s drug/alcohol addiction, porn addiction, gambling addiction, sex addiction, food addiction etc., the thread that runs through all of these is the obsession to change the way we feel from whatever negative feeling we have at the moment. We all know the feeling that comes over us when we feel depressed and reach for that pint of Haagen – Dazs ice cream, perfection. Addiction is the way for us to get that buzz, feel that excitement, the challenge, the accomplishment of changing how we feel. It also brings the ugly crash, the depression, the shame and guilt which starts the never ending wheel of wanting to get away from those painful feelings once again. Our physical body can feel the change as the effects of the alcohol warm what was cold inside of us, how the stimulant gives us that feeling of invincibility, how the opiates create a feeling of heaven on earth. The feelings we have as we watch the porn, throw the dice, eat all those French Fries, scream for our horse down the stretch, that exquisite feeling of the sexual conquest and of course, Shopping Addiction.
The problem is that it never lasts, it always fades until we chase it over and over again. This being true then the only solution is to learn to live with those painful, negative, fear based feelings, whatever they might be. Once we learn this we discover all feelings pass like the clouds in the sky or we learn how to live with them the best we can and get on with our lives. The recovery process allows us to see and find the truth. It gives us the courage not to run away.